Friday, February 19, 2010


I just need to vent about workmans comp in Indiana.  I just talked to my mom on the phone.  Last fall (maybe late summer?) she was getting off a ladder at work and twisted her knee.  The first doctor she saw had her do physical therapy, which didn't help.  The next dr she saw agreed that the physical therapy she was doing was not even helping the right area (nice, huh?).  He changed some of the exercises she was doing, but ultimately, she needed surgery.  I think the area that was torn was called the maniscus? Not sure.  She had the surgery last October.  Anyway, today she talks to workmans comp and they are DENYING her claim.  Denying it.  Saying that it wasn't an "accident."

I always thought workmans comp covered people who were hurt on the job.  I know lots of other people who have gotten coverage because of things that happened on the job.  Mom asked, "So if I was outside salting the sidewalks and slipped on the ice and broke my leg, you wouldn't cover that?"  and they said, "Well, yes, we would, because you would be doing your job."  I think Mom probably about went through the phone at the point when she said, "I WAS DOING MY JOB.  I WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ON A LADDER CLEANING WINDOWS IF I HAD NOT BEEN DOING MY JOB AT WORK."  The lady claimed it could have happened anywhere.  Soooo not the point!  It didnt happen anywhere; it happened at work.  And like Mom said, she would not have been on a ladder if she had not been at work, so really it could not have happened anywhere.

I feel so bad for her.  This is just wrong.  I have heard that Indiana workman's comp is one of the worst in the country to deal with and have the worst coverage.  This proves that. 

I pray that God corrects this injustice.  Its just not fair.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Funny stuff...


Not much to update here.  I've been battling a cold the past couple of weeks that tends to come and go.  I dont sleep well at night (never have) so add a cold on top of that and its made for one tired mama...

We're headed to Mom's this weekend, as long as the weather holds out.  Maya Rose turns 2 on Sunday and we are supposed to make it down for her birthday party...but the weather will determine that.  I'm going to be so disappointed if we can't go!  I'm not doing her cake, just in case we can't make it down, but i did make some sugar cookies tonight that I'm going to decorate just in case we can go.  So check out my cake blog for some (hopefully!) pretty princess crowns and wands in a few days here.  When we were at Michael's on Monday I also found a cute tin that I'm going to fill with some decorated cookies for my cousin Vicky's birthday.  I should get to see her this weekend too, so even though her birthday isnt until March 3, I want to make sure she gets them.   (Vicky, do you read my blog?  lol just in case you do I wont put details of your cookies!)  Vicky is a few years older than me, and she just had her first baby last June.  Oliver is almost exactly 10 months older than baby Alex.  Vicky and I have always gotten along great, but with the age difference and the fact that we've never lived close, we never had a chance to really get to know each other as well as I would've always liked.  After she got pregnant we seemed to connect even more and now talk on a regular basis.  I'm excited to give her her cookie present :)  I love you, Vic! (just in case you do read this!)

And now for your regularly scheduled Oliver picture:
"Hi Mama!"

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Dr. Phil

Let me start out by saying I'm not a big Dr. Phil fan.  I used to be...and then when I saw that he had become a spokesman for, if you know me, you know why I hate

But the other day I was watching an episode and I actually completely agreed and appreciated what he was saying.  The episode was about a couple in Michigan who had used a surrogate to have a baby (turned out to be twins) and after the babies were born, the surrogate decided to keep the babies because she learned that the biological mother had a mental disorder.

Her disorder has vaguely been diagnosed as "psychosis."  She regularly sees a psychiatrist and has been on the same meds for many years, holds a stable job, and is in general, a stable person. The surrogate knew that she was seeing a psychiatrist but never asked why.

(Of course, there is always more to the story than what they show on TV.  But this was the situation they presented.)

There was a CBS correspondant on there defending the surrogate's parents' decision.  Basically saying that someone who had psychosis could not be trusted with a child.


So did Dr. Phil.  He said that this was a dangerous approach to take.  Psychosis is so vague, so broad-spanning, and to state that those diagnosed with this were not fit to be parents was taking a huge leap backward in the advancement of public acceptance of mental illnesses.

I don't personally know anyone diagnosed with psychosis.  (Well, that I know never know, right?) But my dad, mom, brother (my only sibling) and I have all been diagnosed with depression.  My mom and I have also been diagnosed with anxiety.

I was diagnosed with it in college.  I've been on medications since I was 21.  After Oliver was born, my depression took a huge plunge.  I didn't have the typical PPD symptoms...if anything they were opposite of what mothers with PPD normally experience.  I did not want to let Oliver out of my sight.  I rarely EVER put him down.  I held him through all of his naps, we co-slept, everything.  I completely see the positive side of spending that much time with your newborn anyway, and I will probably be like that with the rest of our children.  But with Oliver, my anxiety was so bad that something would happen if I wasn't right there.  I think a lot of it had to do with the pain he experienced with his feet.  I wanted him to know that I was there for him if he was in pain.  As his mother, I knew I could offer him comfort and security that no one else could.  Jay worked 2nd shift until Oliver was 8 months old, so Oliver and I went and did everything together.  I also had terrible guilt about not breastfeeding.

Was I a worse mother because I have depression and anxiety?  Absolutely not.

When Oliver was almost 3 months old I went to my OB/GYN, Dr. Davis, whom I love and he referred me to a psychiatrist whom I still see regularly.

Dr. Holmes helped me to get on some medications that have helped change my life.  I feel more stable and relaxed.  I don't feel an enormous guilt everytime I leave Oliver.  Shoot, for MONTHS I could count in hours how much I had been away from Oliver.  I could tell you exactly each time I had left him.  Now, I'm ok to go to dinner with Amanda, or even just run to the grocery.  Before, it was like physical pain for me to leave him, no matter who it was with.

I still don't leave Oliver often, and never overnight.  He has stayed overnight at my mom's without me only when we went to Brittany's wedding last summer.  If he had been younger (he was 9 mos then) I would have definitely taken him with us, but it was an evening wedding and he would not have lasted long, lol.  But when I do leave him I know that it is ok.

I was just appalled that someone would say on national television that they believe mothers with a mental disorder should not have children.  People are so ignorant.  They do not understand mental illnesses AT ALL.  I was a psych minor in college, and we learned once that as many as 80% of the American population has a mental illness, but that many of them will go undiagnosed because people do not want to seek help. (men in particular.)

When I was pregnant I did not take any anti-depressants or anti-anxiety meds.  I also didnt have a psychiatrist at that time, just my OB.  And I functioned just fine, which some people probably don't understand.  I CAN live without meds, but it is more difficult. 

I could go on and on and on.  But I think I have done my ranting for the day. :-D

and to end on a happier note...heres a picture of Oliver, happy even though our Colts lost the Superbowl :(

Saturday, February 6, 2010


So nothing very exciting has happened, but I feel like I should update just for the heck of it. :-)

Let's see...ohhh Oliver napped for 4 HOURS today!!!!!  Oliver doesn't sleep well on his own so I'm usually either napping with him or at least laying beside him (or in the room) while he naps.  I can't really complain, it gives us some snuggle time, and although I don't get any time to really get caught up on stuff during his naps, I dont really mind. :) :) :)  Plus, I don't sleep well at night so the nap during the day is a big help most days.  Anyway, I knew I would never sleep tonight if I slept very long this afternoon, so I got up and Oliver slept on his own for over an hour and a half of his nap.  YAY!!! I think we checked on him a hundred times during that hour and a half, but he was totally fine of course.  Finally, I heard a little "Mama?...Mama?" from upstairs.  His little voice is so sweet.  And he only stayed up about an hour later than normal for his bedtime, so that wasn't bad at all.

On a totally different note, I found several episodes of the TV series Jack and Bobby on our On Demand...I love that show!!!!  Jenny and I used to watch it all the time sophomore year of college.  I hadn't thought about that show in a long time.  So, I'm watching that as I write this, so I apologize for any (and all!) rambling!

Tomorrow is the Super Bowl!  We will all be decked out in our Colts gear, even Oliver although he for sure wont last to see who wins.

Alright, I'm going to finish this episode, do my nightly Bible reading, and then go to bed.  I need to do some baking, but I am choosing sleep tonight over baking. :-)

P.S. I'm writing a note to remind myself to write a post ranting about the Dr. Phil show I watched the other day.  I'm not a Dr. Phil fan (anyone surprised I'm not a fan of a spokesman?!) but I actually did agree with him on this episode...and wanted to hurt the CBS consultant.  but more on that later, lol...

Monday, February 1, 2010


(Oliver watching Mickey!)
I can't believe January is over already, but I have to say, I'm glad it is. For some reason January is always a drag for me. I think its because the holidays are over (did I mention that we still have stockings hanging up...oops.) and I always have big ambitions for the new year but not the motivation to do them. Its always so dang cold out, and especially with a little one, I don't like to get out in the cold and spend lots of days inside. Plus, February is a short month, and even though our March is usually still cold, there is hope for warm weather soon at that point!

And it seem silly, but I like the fact that the first day of the month starts on a Monday. :) It just seems like a total new start! lol

So I have set a few goals for myself for the month. I'm sure they will be works in progress.

1. Continue to read the chapter of Proverbs that corresponds with the day of the month with Oliver in the morning. Although he doesn't understand all that I am saying, I believe it is very important for him to see that the Bible is a very important book to our family. The only way I can expect for him to someday read the Bible as well is for him to see us reading it.

2. File paperwork/bills/etc. once a week instead of letting it all pile up. (Hmmm which means I also need to catch up on January...)

3. Get into God's word everyday. I know I already said we would be reading Proverbs but God has really laid on my heart to study his word every single day. As Oliver gets bigger and bigger I want him to be used to hearing us talk about God in every area of our lives, whether it be a quick prayer when we wake up in the morning for God to guide us throughout our day, or when I praise him for listening to Mommy or Daddy because God wants us to be obedient to our parents. My parents were wonderful, amazing parents. However, we didn't talk a lot about the Bible in relation to everyday life. In no way do I mean to speak anything against them, please don't read it as that. I just believe every generation has changes that they make with their own families, and thank goodness for that, change is good! I know growing up I always wanted a reason "why, why, why" when my parents told me I needed to do something. (Cleaning my room, Mom? Doing algebra homework, Dad? lol) I want Oliver to grow up having a Biblical basis for why I tell him to do things. Which means I need to really study because I am fairly new myself to really knowing the Bible.

I know there are more things I want to do, but those are my top 3 for now. Besides, I think Oliver needs a diaper :)